Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Resume Normal Programming

I think we literally found paradise. No kidding. The trip was awfully long and tiring plus it was raining terribly when we got to the island so all of us were feeling pretty blue but the next day, the aum decided to ahow off and make us feel the heat so we were able to go island hopping and i was kust awestruck at the magnificence of the beaches. Awesome creations of God! I was all to excited and immediately basked in the glorious sun. There were hardly any tourists so we practically had the whole island to ourselves.
Given that, i haven't run in like 5 days. Eeek.  Supposed to be seriously training for my first jalf maratjon. I am resolved on running tomorrow. Reminds me of how important disciplime is.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Off for a quick one

We're on the road, the husband and i together with 2 friends. God is good and has allowed us to go on a 4 day break after a long time. We're hitting the blue sea and powdery sand in a few hours, thank you Lord.
Knowing that we would be away from the running zone for 4 days-although i did bring my shoes and a pair of running shorts just in case- we made it a point to run for 3 days straight since Monday. We started trying speed training using the (unused) airport runway as our training ground. We have been doing mostly hill reps and lsd's. I have realized how different flat pavement running is. It is very tiring and challenging. We'll see how far we go.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

What i'm thinking

Slept in today and just really felt the urge to sleep past my usual 5am waking time.Ran 17kms the other day and 16kms yesterday. This running thing has really bit me. I am joining my first half marathon in a month and must train seriously mainyl because i need to beat the cut off time of 2hours and 30mins. This worries me-a lot- because i have done 2 16k races and finished at 2:10 and 2:08. I doubt i will be able to cover the last 5k in 20mins.
So thankful for the long weekend. It truly has been a time of refreshing. god is good!

Friday, November 2, 2012

And just like that..

A whole year has gone by and so many significant things have happened. I do wonder what made me open my blog after this long. Although i did realoze that Facebook is such an inappropriate venue to rant, express oneself thoroughly,etc.
Ladeedahdeedah.This feels rather funny.i dont know where to start!
For starters,the kids have grown,we've moved church and have grown in our faith and the husband and i have started running- a lot.
There,i think i  ready to start over.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Low

I have had 10 helpers in 18 months and I don't think that it is doing me or my kids any good. It has traumatized me and my children but I have no choice but to keep getting helpers because I do not have anyone who can take care of my children permanently while I am at work. It is very stressful because it drives me to the point where sometimes anger wells up in me asking why I can't have my Mom or Dad anymore.
I think that I have been trying to deny my feelings of late to pretend that I am ok. I miss my Mom terribly. Even if it has been 6 years, I can't say that the intensity of the feelings have improved in any way. Circumstances like these even make it worse and harder for me to try to move on from the feelings of grief. I don't like it because it hampers my everyday outlook on life. It brings about feelings of desperation and hopelessness. I find myself thinking of "if only" thoughts all the time.
I feel so sorry for my kids. I feel sorry for them because they don't have anyone permanent in their life - except for me and their Dad of course but seeing a new face every other month just makes them wonder what the heck is wrong with them that no one ever stays for good to look after them while both the husband and I are at work. I feel the saddest for my youngest because he has been under the watch of too many caregivers and he is only 2 and a half years old. My eldest grew up with my parents around, my second had a nanny who stayed around until he was 4 years old.
I'm feeling really low right now.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Sugar High


Trick or Treat!!!

Monday, October 31, 2011

My 5 Year Old

Me: Baby, come here pls. Baby! come here, baby.
(calling my 5 year old)

Dash: I'm not a baby Moms!

Me: Well, you are my baby. Come here baby.

Dash: I'm not a baby Moms! I'm a lad.

Me: What?! Lad?! Do you know what a lad is?

Dash: Yes. A small boy.

Me: Uhh ok. Come here then, lad.

Dash: Coming lass!

Me: (Thinking, seriously?!?)

Me: Lass? Am I a lass?

Dash: Yes, you're a small girl.

Me: Small girl? I'm a small girl?

Dash: Yes, you're much smaller than Dad.

Thanks kid. I mean, thanks lad.

Really.