Saturday, August 9, 2008

Clamming Up

Tonight, I am attending an intimate bridal shower / farewell / birthday party of a former officemate who has also become a friend. And although I should be feeling excited about all this (since this is the first time I will be attending a bridal shower {sheesh}), I'm actually stressing about the whole thing.


Because I will be going alone and I don't know most of the people who will be there tonight and even if I will see familiar faces, that's as far as our connection to each other will go. I am totally not a social butterfly who, upon arriving at a party or a social gathering will comfortably hop from one table to another introducing myself, excited to get to know new people. Nope. Not that type. I know it sucks.

I don't know, most of my real real real friends are my friends since first grade. With them I totally feel extremely comfortable and can totally be myself. I can pee in front of them, change in front of them, burp in front of them -- be me when I am with them. Since I had children, I have also sort of taken a step back from looking for more and more groups of friends. I do maintain a healthy social circle of people lets say at work but to actually actively develop as such friendships as possible, it has become a second priority. Besides, I have pretty much loved doing things alone OR with the husband and the kids -- without feeling sorry for myself.

Is that bad?

This may start to sound real petty but I am secretly hoping that things won't be too stressful for me tonight.

Oh, wish me luck.


Sandy C. said...

Wishing you luck and a good time :) I'm the same way around total strangers. Sometimes I'd rather be home in my PJ's with family.

C said...

Hey, Louann!
Awww! Good luck and have fun :) I know what you mean though, because I'm also one who doesn't like going anywhere when I don't know anyone and I don't like going anywhere alone (without someone I know). It's weird, because I did venture to the other end of the planet on my own to teach English in Japan. I didn't know anyone (or the culture and the language!), but I did well!

My husband thinks it's really odd that I don't like going anywhere alone, because I am a very social person and make friends easily. It's easy for me to chat up a storm with I don't know why going to a party or to a restaurant to meet up with people on my own is such an issue!

P.S. I was just going to tell you to pop on over to my blog because there's something there for you...but you beat me to it! ;)


Shoshana said...

I can totally relate. I hope you have a nice time though.

It's that same reason I am all stressed out every time my kids have birthday party. I usually make sure my friends are around so they can sort of relive my stress from time to time when I need to go and hide in the closet to recharge.

Heart of Rachel said...

Hope everything went well at the bridal shower. I'm not too comfortable in parties where I'm not familiar with the rest of the guests. When I have to attend a party like that, I just think of my friend and hope that my presence will mean a lot to her or him.