Thank you for your kind words and thoughts.
Going back, today I found myself just thinking and thinking. And thinking and thinking. I kept praying and have been praying. I know I need to trust God on this even if right at this moment I am finding it hard to believe in what I am saying and in what I want to believe in. God is in control and I know He will never let me go.
Tomorrow, I wonder. I hope. I trust. I'm still thinking and tomorrow, I'll probably still be thinking.