Tuesday, August 7, 2007

It Is Beautiful

One realization that hit me again a few days ago is that I want to try to be perfect. If I can't be perfect the first time, I would want to do whatever it is all over again and make sure that this time around, I focus on making what I wasn't able to make perfect the last time perfect this time.
Like OK, motherhood.
Like right now, when I think of having another baby - given that I totally remove all my hesitations about having another baby like morning sickness and being extremely sensitive or the pain of having another c-section or sleepless nights or having to go back to work when the baby is only 2 months old, child care, etc (the list can go on but the list of why I should have another baby will definitely be longer). I'd want to make a lot of things different the 3rd time around. I would definitely breastfeed much longer (which is why before pushing for the daycare
will have to wait a bit as a proposal for a breastfeeding room is what I am currently working on - will post about this later on). I only fed Dash for 5 months (sniff) but it became rather difficult for me and the baby because his appetite was increasing and due to the lack of stimulation, my milk supply decreased so I was forced to purchase a can of formula milk. Aside from this, I would definitely wear the baby . It never dawned upon me how wonderful this experience must be until I started to read the so many articles on the benefits of baby wearing. Also, I would want to train the baby NOT TO rely on the thumb as my older boy did so for 3 1/2 years! Which is why I gave my second kid a pacifier which I will totally also never encourage my next baby to do! Oh my goodness the addiction! And you know what else? I am totally going to stick to a strict and healthy diet!
And thinking of these things make me excited. In a way it gives me reason and purpose. The realization that I can better next time is how I see it. I may have stated it too strongly - the wanting to be perfect thing - because there is no such thing as perfect. And now I further realize that I guess that's what makes life so beautiful - there is a realization of mistakes and a yearning to want to make things better the second time around. That's why I guess I also believe in second chances - in third chances and in fourth chances.
I guess I chose to focus on motherhood as it is something very close to my heart but there are so many other things that we can work on - for as long as we are given the chance to do so. And it is very important that we are surrounded with love by the people we love and love us to continue to encourage us to keep going, to keep working on making things better, to keep reminding us never to settle for second best.
Because life is beautiful. No matter what the circumstances are, it is. It is a matter of putting things in the right perspective.
Because life is beautiful, We were made beautiful.


Jennboree said...

Life is beautiful. Motherhood isn't perfect. Both are constant :)

There are a few things I did differently with Ava than Bella but more importantly I repeated alot of the same things which I feel gives the girls more of an equal experience with me. If that makes sense.

I co-sleep with Ava as I did Bella. I "wore" Ava as I did Bella (at least as long as my back could take it!). I started Ava on table foods about the same time I did with Bella. I've decided to nurse Ava as long as Bella.

The differences? I too did not encourage the pacifier in any way. We toughed it out and now Ava has no dependency (YAY!). I make Ava take every single nap in her crib and start the night off in her crib. Life's a little easier for all of us with these changes.

Remember that each baby is different. So it isn't really about being a perfect mother, it is about adjusting to each child's needs. THAT to me is what makes a mother near perfect :)

I do hope you'll have another baby! I'd love to read all about your newest experience of pregnancy, infancy and toddlerhood :) It is truly a joy, isn't it?

PinksandBluesGirls said...

You are so right. You have such a wonderful perspective on life.

It would definitely be so much fun to read about your pregnancy and beyond with a third child! You'd just have to change the name of your blog!! Haha!

What does your husband think about adding another little one to the family?

Jane, P&B Girls

Anonymous said...

Ah, you sound like me - the wanting to do it over again to do it perfect, the realization that there is no perfect....

You are so right. No matter what the circumstances, life is beautiful if we choose to put it in the right perspective.

Mama G said...

Well said, my friend!


Chrissy121875 said...

What a beautiful post, Louann. You have such a positive outlook on life. You are such lovely person :)