On to more important things. 2 days ago, my 5 year old came home from school and told me "Mom Steiner punched me." "WHERE?!?!" I demanded. He said, "here (pointing to his neck). I asked him what he did after he was punched. And my 5 year old, being who he is said he didn't do anything.
Last year, almost same incident happened, incidents actually. There was this guy who kept hurting my son. Either pushing him or scratching him or punching him. I informed the teacher on all those occasions and requested the teacher keep a close eye on that bully. And since my son is the type who does not fight back, he did nothing. UNTIL one day, he probably got so fed up and fought back - yes, he punched the boy back. That same day, I got a note from the teacher telling me that my son and his classmates had a brawl. I was mad. So I demanded a meeting with the teacher and the parents of the boy - unfortunately, they said they do not encourage confrontations with other parents. But I met up with the teacher. Necessary disciplinary actions were taken.
Going back to what happened 2 days ago. Deep inside of me, I felt very bad for my son. He is not the type who fights back. He is the kind of boy, who - sadly - allows himself to be bullied. Yes, that's how he is. Even in playgroups, he really is that way. Not the leader type. Not the aggressive one. Not the initiator. He is such kind spirited boy.
So when he was telling me about the most recent incident, deep down inside of me, what I really wanted to tell him was "Never be the first to hurt but if they hurt you, defend yourself." I had to reword it of course. I just told him never to allow anyone to hurt him, that he will have to also defend himself. Why can some children be so mean?
What do you think?
We will never always be there to defend our children. In the long run, they will have their own lives. And they will have to stand up on their own.