Some Therapy and Maybe A Bit Of Sanity For Me, Please.

You want to know what I need right now?

Just now, like just a few minutes ago, I just realized that I need to hang out or be with married women who have kids. Getting to know so many wonderful mommies via the blog sphere has made me want to be with them or with people like them.

Like I would really want to meet Angel, aside from the fact that we both graduated from the same University (but different campus), we both have lost our Dads and when I get to read her posts about her Dad, I can so relate to what she wants to get across to her readers. And then there's SusieJ. who I know is such a wonderful woman. And mommies of boys really amaze me - she's got 4. Plus she shares so many wonderful things - from crafts to home remedies for when you're sick. And as I have followed her blog religiously, I have come to the conclusion that she is a woman of wisdom. I'd love to be able to tell stories with her, ask about her first years of marriage, first time with her first baby and how her life has changed with every thing else that has happened in between. If I get to meet Amanda Sue, I'd want to listen to her stories about her special needs students - that would be very interesting. And I'm sure I would ask about how she is able to balance her work, her married life, her kid and her pregnancy! There are also these 2 amazing women I have met, Mama G and Sophiagurl who are also career women. How do they do it? Do they experience times of just wanting to be a SAHM? How to they combat that feeling and go on with balancing family and career? And when you choose to have a career outside of the home, is it OK to be a go-getter and strive for that spot in the corporate world where you can say you are boss? What issues do they face when they get home? And having a nice cup of coffee with Jane and Audrey would be a wonderful experience, you know just to get to sit down and experience the love they have for each other as sisters. Plus, Jane is just a year older than I am, she doesn't have kids yet, but I would love to listen to what she plans for her and her family in the future. And then Audrey has 3 boys, and again, women with baby boys amaze me. But, women with little girls, like Jennboree are also amazing. Jenn is a SAHM and I would love to hear her stories about how amazing it is to be able to spend your whole day with your children. How great can that be, right? Will she want to work later on when her kids are older? And there are these 2 Filipina's I also "met" Chrissy and Shoshanna who seem like pretty amazing women too.

I have great friends, like really great friends. Friends who have seen me through everything, friends I have know for almost 18 years. But like last Saturday, when I met up with a few friends who happen to all be single, I started listening to the issues they have right now, listened to them rant about the problems they are faced with. And on a few points I was able to totally relate to them - when they started to talk about work and all its toxicity. I was there. And then they started to talk about boyfriends - the lack of it, that is. And i sat there and thought that if this conversation were happening at least 7 years ago, I would be able to pitch in and share my complaints and thoughts about it. But at that point, I couldn't. Some of my friends are at that 'date all you want,' 'collect before select' stages of their lives, some are looking for long time commitments because marriage is so a part of their life plans and would want to find the man already and some of my friends are already beyond that and have found peace in knowing that there is a possibility that they will remain single and childless forever.
Their stories entertain me. I occasionally get amused. Other times, I just sit there and find myself saying to myself "I don't believe this." Most of the time I speak my opinion. Like I can't say I am wise and all that to be giving them expert advise like the typical "been there done that, so I SHOULD know" attitude some people always try to put up as a front but I share what's on my mind.

But you know? Honestly, I would really want to sit and listen to people rant about how hard it is to balance work, family and self. How difficult it also is to maintain a happy marriage. I mean what do your husbands have to say about dividing your time between him, your work and the kids? How sad is it to know that you don't even have enough time and energy to cook up the favorite dishes of your loved ones - that you resort to simple and less time consuming dishes. And really, those single out there who keep complaining about not having enough time, what do you think working / studying moms fee then? I want to listen to stories about the differences of siblings.

To put things in the simplest of simple terms, I need to have friends who I can relate to (And vice versa) in the now stage of my life. Just to also know that what I am experiencing is totally real and not abnormal. It will be for my sanity.