Wednesday, October 7, 2009


I don't remember the last time I saw the sun shining. I miss the warmth of the sun on a chilly "ber" month. It has been stormy the past 5 days and I haven't been enjoying the weather that much.

Today the bank I work for decided to declare early closure because of the horrible weather. I was more than happy to know that I could start packing my bag a little before 4PM. The whole day, all I could think about was being home with the kids (since classes were suspended for pre school and grade school). So as soon ans the clock ticked 4, I called my husband and told him I was ready to be picked up.

On the way home, I got to start thinking, until when will I feel this way? Until when will I be all too excited to go home and be with the kids? Since I gave birth to my 3rd child, I have been extremely "into the kids." Not as if I wasn't into them before but this time, I feel different. The feeling of just wanting to be with my family is much, much stronger now. In the past, I seemed to have so many other things I wanted to do other than to just be with the family. While my husband drove home, I was thinking, what would life be 5 or 10 or 15 years from now? When my eldest would be in college and the middle and the youngest in highschool? When they will have their own schedules and interests and friends and priorities. I'm afraid. What will I do then? What will I rush home to?

It's been raining. And spirits ave been dampened.

1 comment:

Momisodes said...

I'm so sorry you're feeling down. I think it's wonderful you're enjoying your family now. But I think in time, as your children gradually grow, so will you. And you will adjust. Hang in there.