Wednesday, February 28, 2007


Oh My God because there are just SO many things happening now -- with my kids, at home, at work and with hubby.

So I now have a 5 year old who will be moving up to Prep I this April. Eeeks! He has 2 years before he enters 1st grade. 1st grade!?!
Dash turns 9 months today. Quite sad in a way. Just another reminder for me that my baby may soon not be a baby anymore. Arghh. And seriously, when I hold Dash in my arms - which happens very seldom now a days as he prefers to be moving around the house 'independently' - I secretly say to myself that, uh, I think I will want another one of these cute things by next year. Ahhh! I know, I am dreading that thought. I thought I was all good with my 2 boys why want another baby again?
OK, aside from that I have been stressed just thinking about this: Our nanny wants to pursue a college degree (!). I know. And she wants to enroll by this June. She told me she will only be getting a few units so that she will have more time for Dash. I also have MY own plans of continuing my Masters degree while still working. And even if I have told myself a number of times that I will expect Jet to care for Dash while the nanny is gone I do not wish to pretend that that will be a perfect plan. Yes Jet can care for the kids. IN fact I can leave the kids with him for a whole day but not for DAYS. Like it becomes his routine? NO way. I know that we will end up fighting.
I have considered resigning -- even if I love my job. But if I leave my job, I will be throwing away my health insurance which also covers my hubby and the kids, a good enough compensation package and other perks that the family gets to enjoy. Come to think of it, I am pretty lucky to have my job, considering the fact that our city has very few big, transnational companies.
Unless hubby gets a job by then, then maybe I will seriously consider finding a part time job, like maybe tutoring ESL.
Then there's the dilemma with the nanny. Should I still keep her? Will it all be worth it? If I let her go, it is very hard to find a replacement, more so, someone like her. She has been with us for 3 years and has not caused us any major problems. I can trust my kids with her, I can leave the home and know that when I come back my house has not burned down, she never touches my jewelry and we trust that she never touches our money.
So what do you think?
And oh yeah, hubby and I will be celebrating our 10 years of being together! Aahhhh! March 13, 1997. That was the day I met the boy who would eventually become my husband. Together for 10 years, living together for 6 years and married for 3 years.
More on our love story later.
I gotta go stress myself out some more


Chaos Control said...

If you have a great relationship with the nanny and you trust her, and if the kids adore her, then I'd suggest trying to make it work if possible. Trying to find someone else would, as you say, be very difficult - and even if you find someone with perfect qualifications and background, they might not be the right personality for your kids ...

louann said...

i know. but it really is hard. or maybe i am worrying too muc? i worry too much. i pray things will work out by june (that's when school starts).
thanks-really :)